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And That’s Why You Have More Than One Baby Daddy

What if I told you that the young woman your clowning for having more than one man as a father to her two or three children is married to one of those fathers, stable, happy and grateful to have made the choices she’s made. What would you think of her then? Is she still a ho? Is she still trifling? Are her children still doomed to be ostracized by society for having different fathers? Wait, before you answer, understand that what you think doesn’t even matter. So save it. Its unnerving when people believe that because a woman has more than one “baby daddy,” she’s a horrible decision maker. She’s spreading her legs for whomever wants to lay between them. She has low self esteem…. etc etc.. If you’re a regular citizen, living on a minimum wage income, with a link card in a one bedroom apartment, its frowned upon to have more than one baby daddy. But for celebrities, like Kimora Lee Simmons who has three baby daddies, its looked over. That’s a double standard. There is no gray area for women who have children by different men. Its all black and white. Either you do or you don’t. Women that have children who are in relationships with men that don’t can have it a little hard. Its complicated because he may not know if they’re looking for a father figure to their children, if the biological father is in their life, and whether or not, he may be her next victim. So unfortunately many of those relationships don’t last. Women become depressed because of it, sometimes resenting the father of their children, the children or even themselves. They begin to feel like they’ve made countless mistakes and society will look at them as a statistic rather than a mother. Its really shallow to believe that women who have more than one baby daddy is only looking for a government check, a link card and child support and will continue to get pregnant as long as the government will take care of her. Many of those women are actually in school, working, living on their own and maintaining a decent lifestyle. But they can’t get away from the fact that when they’re walking down the street with there kids who all look different, they get stares from strangers who automatically judge them and their lives. Its sick and I find it to be disgusting. Have you ever thought that some of these women were actually in love with these men. Why aren’t the men ever held accountable? Its always the woman’s fault that her children have different fathers. As a woman I feel its my duty to encourage women in these situations to hold their head high and smile at those who judge them. Your children are not mistakes. Your choices are your choices and its up to you to learn from them and move on. Do not let them hold you back from life. You deserve respect just like the next person regardless of how many men you’ve slept with and had a baby by. Your only responsibility is to take care of your children to the best of your ability, not worry about what people’s opinions of you are. People will talk about you and call you all types of names and challenge your dignity as a woman. So what. I guarantee you love is still out there somewhere waiting for you. Just wait on it.

3 thoughts on “And That’s Why You Have More Than One Baby Daddy”

  1. I totally agree with this piece. My wife has 3 kids. Two from a previous relationship, which lasted 7yrs. One by me and we're 5yrs strong. I've noticed a lot if women get judged but people never know their story. Even if they did they still don't deserve to be judged. Now some women and men can be careless. I hope they learn from their mistakes. But most of time its because most couples believe they will be together. I know people who judge that have mothers and fathers who have children by different women and men. This piece was well written.

    Like

  2. I totally agree with this piece. My wife has 3 kids. Two from a previous relationship, which lasted 7yrs. One by me and we're 5yrs strong. I've noticed a lot if women get judged but people never know their story. Even if they did they still don't deserve to be judged. Now some women and men can be careless. I hope they learn from their mistakes. But most of time its because most couples believe they will be together. I know people who judge that have mothers and fathers who have children by different women and men. This piece was well written.

    Like

  3. Thank u so much and I totally agree Vance. Women get ridiculed for everything and many times men don't get the same criticism. Women are called sluts for sleeping with two men at the same time yet men are praised for it. Its terrible.

    Like

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